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I just clicked on that new thing on Facebook that says “look at your 2013 year.” I don’t know why. I just thought, maybe, Facebook might just magically know what the best times were.

As I was scrolling through the funny (and often embarrassing) moments of 2013: the time I passed out on New Years and got glitter bombed, the time I put a bra on my head for my siblings entertainment, I couldn’t help but think about what a wonderful year it’s been–now that the end of it is approaching.

Until, of course, I came across a picture of Grey and me. I was sure I had destroyed all of the evidence–except the photo booth pictures I have hidden away somewhere.

We looked so at ease, mid laughter, candid. Fingers intertwined. At a bar somewhere. One we went to only once, had a great night and never went back–like so many things in our relationship.

I’ll have to remember to follow Carrie’s advice more carefully next time, “Destroy all the pictures where he looks sexy, and you look happy.”

Safe to say I got that photo off my timeline as quickly as I could. I don’t want to remember the good times. i just want to forget that any times happened at all.

I’ve been feeling alive and strong and adding heartache to this freezing Thursday makes finals seem only that much more ominous.